Well, I’ve been on SA now for 12 years. Remember, it’s the most “rough and tumble” sailing forum around…making forums like SN and CF look like knitting circles.

Its history is the typical “in-your-face, speak truth to power, call-out-the-BS, burn-down-the-hypocrisy, never-back-down, smacktalk-everyone” approach that sailors have long been known for. Its slogan is the seemingly anti-establishment “Where The Status Quo Blows”. On its surface, it appears to be the ultimate “Fight Club For Sailors”. So it fits my posting “personality” pretty well.

Now, the longtime face of this club has been one “Mr. Clean”, seen here at the entrance:


Personally, I’ve never had much respect for the dude – “hobbylistically” speaking that is. I obviously don’t know him personally (and don’t care to) – so can’t speak to that. He may be a great guy. But his work and approach on Sailing Anarchy was always excruciatingly crude, pedestrian, and needlessly loud. He single-handedly managed to lower the bar of even “Gonzo Journalism” itself. And that’s saying something,

But more to the point, he was rarely right in his analysis or predictions of what was going on in sailing. He therefore never really drew much of an audience. He was just kind of a hanger-on. (And BTW – I said this directly to him when he was trolling me in my SailGP thread.)

On the other hand…

If you know me, you know that I’m pretty much the polar opposite of all that. Handsome, clever, intelligent, witty, embarrassingly talented – but most importantly, almost always right. Oh, and my threads across all the forums I’ve graced have generated millions of views (and still going). They are always the most popular threads on any forum.

So, after spending years in the somewhat sedate world of Cruising Anarchy while busy with other things in other places, I stumbled onto SailGP in July of last year with Season 1 already underway. And the only thread on SA dedicated to it at that time happened to be in the America’s Cup Anarchy forum…where SailGP was being mercilessly trashed by the haters.

So, though I’d never posted anything in the AC forum and didn’t know any of the posters therein, I did what I do and strolled right in and started smacking noses. And as usual, I wiped the floor with those chuckleheads…spawning the now world-famous term KiWhingersTM. You’re welcome world.

That then lead me into the broader America’s Cup conversation which, due to the above KiWhinging, lead me to ceaselessly point out how much of a dumpster fire AC36 has become under the wrinkly and allegedly/possibly “sticky” hand of the Emirati team’s CEO. And, as I tend to do where ever I go, I took over that conversation as well. I became, yet again, a “star” atop the pinnacle of sailing. Heh.

So, as I began to build both a significant following and analytical cachet across SA by presenting actual facts, providing accurate insights, and correctly predicting outcomes – Mr. Clean, now very long in the journalistic tooth, apparently took notice from his Political Anarchy retirement home. I can only assume he felt his position as a self-appointed “sailing spokesman” was being threatened by my growing prowess.

“Who the hell does this ‘Smackdaddy’ fellow think he is?”, he surely mumbled as he put in his teeth. And, like a rarely seen possum, he wobbled out of his smelly little hole and began to stalk and bait me across the threads.

Now, on that point, look at the reason for his “moderator” warning: “Repeated Stalking”.

See, this is one of the very few reasons a member can be “moderated” on SA…

We do not take action for foul language, off-subject content, or abusive behavior unless it escalates to persistent stalking.  There may be times that we might warn someone or flick someone for something particularly egregious.

That’s cute. Why? Well, I don’t follow the dude around at all because he’s completely uninteresting to me. It’s clearly the other way around. He comes into the threads where I post and he baits. You can see that by simply looking at my post history and content in our interactions, then looking at his.

In any case, Mr. Clean’s “masterful baiting” efforts were, as you’d imagine, wholly unsuccessful as I continually wiped the floor with the dude at every single turn. As he grew increasingly aggressive and personal in his stalking, I simply parried with even more incisive wit and silliness (such as the hilarious spoof image above). His frustration clearly grew, until…”moderation”. Heh.

Keep in mind, even with me going directly after Clean in the past for things like his infamous “Pink Flag” incident, and his ridiculous bluster surrounding the infamous Dan Meyers/SA suit (where it turned out my jurisprudent predictions were right yet again – and Clean’s were completely wrong), I had NEVER received any kind of warning or anything else on SA (though he lied about that too).

So, what was the egregious “stalking” offense that spurred this stern warning after 12 years? Why, thusly replying to his comment on one of my posts…

(Note the S+S math analogy? Brilliant.)

Now, obviously on SN or CF, inviting someone to “simmer in their own stupid” would cross the line. But remember, this is SA where, allegedly, “abusive behavior” is actually encouraged and “you just fight it out like a man”, etc. I mean, that’s the world Clean and Ed themselves supposedly built and foster. And it’s not like the man himself couldn’t throw down the dreaded S-word with aplomb…

Of course – most of his posts directed at me go FAR beyond that little slight, which I won’t print here. But if you look, you’ll clearly see who is stalking whom.

So, it seems Mr. Clean’s tender feelings are now hurt – and he’s got a vendetta simmering deep within his soul. Hypocrisy is hard, man.

I can’t stop cracking up. Wiping the floor with Mr. Clean’s lemon-scented tears…

PS – Maybe it’s because I turned down his request to grab a beer during SXSW? Who knows? In any case, chins up old chum. It’s just forum silliness after all. Heh.

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