2011 Race To The Border

PREFACE:
Throughout my illustrious posting career on sailing forums, lots of crusty chumps have mocked the fact that I sail in a lake – and, therefore, “have no idea what it’s REALLY like to sail in the deadly ocean”. Sure, they had a point, but, as I assured them, they were still chumps. It always seemed that this “insult” was as much about squelching enthusiasm for sailing in big conditions as it was putting me in what they thought was my place (like that ever works). So, this “puddle sailor” decided to see what the oceanic hubbub was all about…and simultaneously prove to said chumps that lake sailors could indeed survive in blue water. Continue reading 2011 Race To The Border

SmackSpeak

The world-famous Smackdaddy is available to share his fascinating views on big sailing at your major function. Whether a Safety at Sea Seminar, a Major Boat Show, a Fortune 100 Corporate Team-Building Event, a Bat Mitzvah, or even a Quinceañera, Smack can bring the heat.

His patented “You don’t really need to know anything, just pretend you do and GO FOR IT!” philosophy has motivated countless thousands to blithely get in way over their heads. It can work for you and your organization too!

His fee is only USD$35,000 per 1-hour speaking engagement (with accompanying list of “Outrageous Diva Demands” in the Contract – such as white chocolate Snickers, diesel-scented candles in the dressing room, and BFS Skullies for the valets and ushers.)

Or, let one of the most trusted voices in outdoor adventure endorse your product! Sales will “skyrocket” when Smackdaddy lights the fuse! Great outdoorsmen such as Bear Grylls and CardiB learned everything they know from Smack. Only USD$125,000 per year (with a lot of ridiculous fine print if the harebrained scheme actually works).

Contact us for details!